What did she say?
by KeDe
Summary: Missing scenes from Smile. This is my take on what Alex really meant when she answered Bobby’s question with the ridiculous comment: “It’s too late.”
1. Chapter 1

_Goren to Eames: "You worried about what she said -- that your career could be tainted by me?" _

_"I used to," Alex admitted without hesitation. _

_"And now?" Bobby wanted to know. _

_"It's too late," Alex said, briefly looking back at him before walking out of the room.  
_

**Chapter 1**

Bobby had only been half serious when he asked her that. Her answer stung him to the core. How could she say that to him and just walk away, with no explanation, or better yet, no immediate apology? After all this time!

Alex stuck her head in the door. "You coming?"

"No, you go ahead," Bobby said, not looking at her. "I've got something to do."

For a moment, Alex looked at Bobby curiously but decided not to question him. Not just yet, anyway. Although she hadn't said it, Leslie LeZard had correctly deduced that Bobby was an egomaniac who thought all women were smitten by him. Now, he was no doubt disappointed that the only interest Leslie had in him was to manipulate him to further hide her crime.

Alex left the Shore Office and went outside. She watched as the officers escorted Leslie LeZard to the patrol car and drove off. Leslie was a woman who had figured out how to get what she wanted. Usually, but not this time.

Alex got into her own car and headed in the opposite direction of One Police Plaza. Returning to the office was the last thing she wanted to do. Knowing Bobby as she did, Alex was sure he'd go there and start on the report for this case. That is, once he picked his bruised ego up off the floor. That "something he had to do" was go off to himself and brood for a bit before returning as if nothing had happened. He had to show that he wasn't affected by anything.

xx

Bobby waited for a few minutes until he thought Eames had gone. He was angry with her, but unlike her, he didn't want to say something that would hurt her feelings.

Bobby had to agree, Leslie was right when she said Eames was never going to make captain. She wasn't that good! Hell, talk about Leslie's career arc being tied to Pallin. Eames' career arc was definitely tied to him -- and in a good way for her. He was the one who figured out the cases! If anything, Eames was just window dressing.

Bobby marched out of the office and plowed through a group of the Shore employees who were gathered together, no doubt still reeling from the death of one of their own. The sight of Leslie LeZard being escorted out in handcuffs would give them something to talk about for months.

"Excuse me," he mumbled, not stopping and silently fuming at Eames' lack of sensitivity to his feelings.

Bobby went outside, hopped in a cab, and went straight home. He didn't even stop at his favorite Italian restaurant for take-out because he didn't want to talk to anyone. He just needed to get home, to himself, to think.

xxx


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2  
**Alex drove to a small park in midtown that she had first discovered after Joe had been killed. To try and keep her head together and her mind from wrapping around the fact that Joe had been murdered, she had often walked. She still did, for miles throughout the City. She had been on one of her many walks when she happened upon this little hamlet. Now, she often came here when she needed to unwind, especially after a grueling case.

Parking was tight but she found a spot in front of a church. She knew it was illegal but she was a cop and being able to park illegally was one of the perks of the job.

It was almost dusk but there were still a few children playing on the jungle gyms, their parents, nannies or babysitters nearby. Alex found a secluded spot on a bench and sat down wearily.

Leslie was a smart cookie, Alex had to admit, but not smart enough, even with all her "research". She certainly had Bobby pegged, though. He was insubordinate and unstable. It was something his colleagues had come to accept, even Alex. That didn't mean she wasn't furious with him for playing renegade detective once again. Earlier when he had told her that he had met with Leslie, she had just stood there with her mouth open. What could she say that he could possibly relate to? Even in all his "brilliance," Bobby often forgot about the concept of partnership.

xx

Bobby entered his apartment, locked the door behind him, and hung up his coat. He knew he should have gone back to the office with Alex so they could file their report, but he didn't want to be anywhere near her right now. He wondered if after each case she gave herself credit for keeping him in line, and accepted pats on the back for lasting so long with the "whack job."

Bobby took a shower -- as hot as he could stand it -- then slipped into sweat pants and a tee shirt. In the quiet serenity of his apartment, he began to relax. He poured himself a glass of red wine and heated up some pasta he had made fresh last night. He sat down at the table but had little appetite. He was beginning to wonder if he could trust Eames anymore. If he couldn't trust her then they shouldn't be partners. He needed to know she had his back, especially since he was the one doing the heavy lifting. Before, that hadn't mattered to him, even after he found out about the letter she wrote requesting a new partner. He had been consoled by the fact that she had pulled it back and remained his partner. Eames had always been the one colleague who had seemingly supported him without reservation. Now, he had to truthfully ask himself why she was still with him. And the reason was obvious: she needed him. Their arrest and conviction rate was stellar -- and all because of his keen insight into the criminal mind. So what if he went off the deep end every now and then, they always got their man. Or woman in Leslie LeZard's case. Ah, Leslie. She was a cutie. But a liar. And worse, a murderer.

Because he could tell Eames was angry when he told her about his meeting with Leslie, he had been deliberately vague and decided not to mention that there had been two meetings. Hell, he didn't care about her being angry. He was after a killer. Granted, he hadn't realized before he met her for dinner that Leslie was the killer. But he did feel that something was not quite right where she was concerned. None of that should matter anyway, so Eames could just climb down from her high horse.

xxx


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

**  
**It was getting dark and Alex knew she should leave the park. But she didn't want to go home. Alone. And she certainly didn't want to go into the office. She got into her car and went home.

Alex looked in the refrigerator for something to eat. "Damn," she said. Not much there unless she wanted some ketchup, olives, or a zillion packets of soy sauce. She closed the refrigerator and looked in the cabinet. She took out a box of saltines and sat down at the kitchen table. She wondered what was on the menu at Rikers. Whatever it was, it was too good for Leslie LeZard with her padded resume, fake marathon time, and phony Yale cap. Maybe she could use some of that wiliness to gain a few perks with the prison guards. She had certainly used it on Bobby.

Alex ate a few more saltines, gulped a glass of water and crawled into bed.

xx

Bobby finished his pasta and took one sip of the wine. He poured the rest of the glass down the drain. He had never been a drinker. He wanted to maintain control, although he was aware that a lot of people thought he was always on the verge of losing control. What was the word, _unstable_, yeah, that was it. Bobby grimmaced, then laughed out loud as he turned out the kitchen light. No one really had any idea who he was.

xxx


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4  
**

Alex was startled when her alarm went off the next morning. She was surprised that she had been able to sleep. She was glad she had slept because she was rested and strangely comforted. They had successfully closed another case and Bobby would be at his desk when she got there. That's what comforted her, their routine.

xx

Bobby was still up when the sun rose. He stood at his tiny bathroom window with his mug of decaf and watched as the sun slowly rose up from behind the huge buildings that always shielded a part of his view.

xx

Alex was surprised when she got to the office and Bobby wasn't at his desk. Her heart skipped a beat when she looked and saw him sitting in Ross' office. What did that mean?

When Ross saw her he motioned for her to join them. Bobby's back was to her so she couldn't see his face. What had he been telling Ross? What the hell was this about? Alex entered Ross' office and closed the door without being asked.

"I was just chewing out your partner for not checking in last night. If the case was closed, I of course expected to see the report on my desk first thing this morning." Ross made a show of looking around his office. "I don't have it." He looked to Alex for further explanation.

She didn't have an explanation unless she confessed she thought Bobby might be pining over a missed booty call.

When Ross saw he wasn't going to get an explanation from Alex, he said to both of them, "Work on the report first thing and try to finish before another case opens up."

xxx


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5  
**

Alex and Bobby went to their desks. "I thought you came back here," she said.

Bobby remained silent, choosing instead to fumble with some papers on his desk. He was surprised she hadn't come back to the office either.

Alex sat down. "Are you mad at me about something?"

"You don't know, do you?"

"No, but I do know this: I'm mad too--"

"About what," Bobby asked, frowning.

"About how you just forgot or didn't bother to tell me beforehand about your little rendevous with Leslie LeZard."

Bobby was incredulous. Rendevous? Was she serious? She had to know he'd never compromise an investigation that way. Yesterday he had held back and didn't say anything that would hurt her, but damnit, he had feelings too. If she wanted to act silly, he'd play the game too. "Which rendevous? I met her on the Staten Island ferry and also for dinner."

Now, it was Alex who was incredulous. He had only told her about the meeting on the ferry now he admited he had met her for dinner also. Was he bragging?

"There was no rendevous, Eames! I suspected she was up to something and I was trying to get information from her. What do you think, I was trying to sleep with her?"

Alex didn't answer. Who could blame her if she thought he wanted to sleep with Leslie? He was a man after all. She was immediately ashamed. Or was she embarrassed? Was she jealous? Was it that obvious? Alex searched for words but couldn't find any. Saying she was sorry was probably most called for here but she just couldn't bring herself to say it.

"When did you stop trusting me?"

Alex felt really bad now. This had all gotten blown so out of proportion.

"Should we write all this in the report?" Bobby asked.

"Let's just drop it." Alex flipped open her laptop with the intent to start writing the report and to get him to indeed drop it.

Bobby was not so easily disuaded. "No, let's finish this. Should I apologize to you for keeping you from ascending the blue ladder--"

"What?" Alex looked at him, utter surprise clouding her features.

"Instead of sitting out here with me, do you think by now you should be the one in the Captain's office?"

"What?" No, wait. Now she got it. "You're angry about what Leslie LeZard said. It was the rantings of a desperate woman who knows she's on her way to prison." Alex wouldn't tell him she had taken some of those rantings about him to heart.

"I'm not angry about what she said, Eames. I'm angry about what you said. If you didn't think our partnership was working, why wait so long to admit it?"

"Bobby, you have it all wrong." While she had been mulling over what Leslie had said about Bobby, he had been mulling over what Leslie had said about her. Alex hated that they were giving this woman so much power.

"You know, it might not be too late if you get out now."

"What the hell are you talking about?"Alex asked, although she thought she knew.

"When I asked you if you now felt your career was tainted by me, you said it was too late. How do you think that made me feel?"

"Obviously not very good," Alex said, frantically searching for the right words to convey what she had meant. "I can see now how it could be misinterpreted. Bobby it was a compliment--"

"A compliment? How the hell is that a compliment?"

"I'll admit, I had aspirations of being a Captain, but that was years ago. I love being a detective. The time for me to want to do something different has come and gone." The puzzled look on Bobby's face bothered her. Why didn't he understand? Alex plowed on. "When I pulled back that letter, I had decided I was in this with you for the long haul . . . Not just for a year or two or until the going got tough. I was in it for keeps. I still am. That doesn't mean I always agree with your methods."

The hard look on her partner's face was now softening. He was slowly understanding.

"It is too late," Alex said. "I've come to appreciate your unorthodox way of doing things. If I had wanted to do something different, I would have done it years ago. I haven't thought about being a Captain in years, not since you made me really appreciate the joy in getting the bad guys."

Her assurance pleased Bobby but he wasn't willing to let her off the hook just yet. "I'm never going to be orthodox."

"I know that." Was he still angry?

"You'll have to take the good with the bad."

"I understand that, Bobby." She smiled.

"And you have to trust me." Of everything, this was the most important to him.

"I do trust you," Alex said. And she did trust him, even if he did make her crazy. And a little jealous. She couldn't imagine not having him in her life.

Bobby felt better now that they had cleared the air. So what if she got cranky once in a while. She was a woman, after all. Besides, he knew his style took a lot of getting used to, and frankly, his methods had worn out his previous partners. Nevertheless, he was relieved that Alex wasn't having regrets about their partnership. He should have realized that she too did plenty of heavy lifting. Carrying the burden of whack job Bobby Goren as a partner was enough to weigh anyone down.

_The End_


End file.
